Denial Perhaps.

For me at the moment, dads death is feeling to easy to deal with. Maybe thats because I've not coped so well with traumatic things in the past, and I'm a much stronger person mentally now. Or I have been thinking that perhaps it's because I was estranged from him for around 7 years, and only had 1 year with him in my life. Of which from February till the end of October I only got to see him once a move on my monthly home visit from rehab. So I only really had less than 4 months with him properly in my life again. That maybe I've gone into some sort of denial because I'm not used to him being around, so him not being around isn't unusual. If that makes any sort of sense.. it does to me.

I'm not really sure how any of that makes me feel whatsoever. I'm just glad to feel on an even keel.